Monday, August 25, 2008
Empty moments
This path I've chosen to take uses many adjectives. Exciting, mysterious, loving, warm, selfless, exhausting, frightening, and just plain difficult. I've kind of been staggering lately, tripping over myself as I look to the right, left, and directly behind me. Some days I just stand there, looking at everything around me, ignoring the Goal, the Light, the Way. Everything I've picked up along this path I've kind of held onto, and now I'm scared of letting them go. Some days I assess the state I'm in and think about quitting this hike, this race, this journey. Satan's getting really good at convincing me why I should abandon the Way. I'm stuck between letting go of my life and letting go of my journey. I can either abandon my life and hop onto this thrill ride that is following Christ, or I can abandon that ride and keep my life. I can't keep both. It's not that I'm doubting God's existence or anything, haha, that's a little too drastic. It's just that I'm not feeling the closeness we used to have. It's very quiet. And that's a factor that I've caused. This disease of selfishness has once again, for the quadrillionth time, infected me. And the thing I find hating the most is exactly what I am. I HATE IT!!!!!!
^
Exactly how I feel. (I couldn't upload the picture, so I gave you a link)
^
Exactly how I feel. (I couldn't upload the picture, so I gave you a link)
Thursday, August 21, 2008
No sleep
I haven't slept since Tuesday night/early Wednesday. Staying awake is weird. I want to read this book on harmony but I know I can't cus I'll fall asleep if I do. So I might as well just keep on hammerin' that D 212(1)1311. I'm into a lot of things in D right now. And every time my fingers dance across the keys, the sound that's produced spells out "you're at a standstill."
I'm waiting for the bus even though it's passed by me a thousand times. I just keep saying, "No, not now God."
I'm waiting for the bus even though it's passed by me a thousand times. I just keep saying, "No, not now God."
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Artists Block: Photography
I'm getting tired of this obstacle I have to overcome every time I set out somewhere with my camera. The obstacle is fear. Specifically, it's the self-conscious type of fear. Every time some friends and I are going somewhere, I try to have my camera with me. It's really one of the very few tools man has created that can accurately capture a moment. Maybe the only tool, because video is just a series of photographs. I go through phases with my photography and I'm in the "accurately capture the mood of the scene in any given moment" phase. I'm not worried about the color scheme, the composition or how well the light can play off my subject like I used to be. My greatest concern is capturing the essence of whatever I'm going through. The reason I'm into this documentary type of photography is because all too often, my mind gets caught in a time warp. I find my Imagination and I visiting the past, and as I'm there, Imagination screws up the accuracy of every moment. A memory ALONE is the cheapest process of time travel. They're housed on quicksand and they're able to mold into any shape imaginable, before you know it...they look nothing like the original because they've sunk into the ground and it's structure has been completely altered. I'll give some props to memory though...because without it, looking at a photograph would be like looking at a blank sheet of paper. Photographs would become useless without our memories. All I'm saying is that I can no longer rely on memory alone...I don't want to do away with it :P haha. The purpose photographs serve is to sustain an accurate depiction of an event in our minds. It keeps that memory alive. BUT I HAVEN'T TAKEN ANY BECAUSE I'M TOO WORRIED ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE ARE THINKING OF ME AS I'M FREEZING TIME!!!! HOW DUMB IS THAT!!!
I'm on this train that doesn't stop until my cart switches tracks leading it off the earth. Every beautiful landscape I pass I'm given the opportunity to take with me. And as I'm given the opportunity, I know I'll never get to visit it again. Even then, I decide to just take it all in with my eyes. So I keep riding, pressing my forehead against the window that has been stained with grease from me constantly looking back. The tragic thing about looking back is that we miss what's passing right in front of us.
I'm on this train that doesn't stop until my cart switches tracks leading it off the earth. Every beautiful landscape I pass I'm given the opportunity to take with me. And as I'm given the opportunity, I know I'll never get to visit it again. Even then, I decide to just take it all in with my eyes. So I keep riding, pressing my forehead against the window that has been stained with grease from me constantly looking back. The tragic thing about looking back is that we miss what's passing right in front of us.
Monday, August 18, 2008
A Late Fashion Comeback
Soup Kitchen
I can't elaborate very much, it's getting really late.....early.....but the worship service our missions group did today at the soup kitchen was awesome!!!! I don't know if it was God's Spirit leading my praise or if all the energy I put forth today was all my own. Either way, I tried to keep it to where I there was nobody around me. I emptied the room, destroyed the buidling, threw the earth and all the stars into a never ending abyss and let God fill the void.
Now that I think of it, this is the first time I've participated in leading a worship service. To give you a good idea of what we were working with I'll explain to you the setting. And I'm going to be real honest, I'm not going to try and cover it up with candy drop sweet talk and what have you.
The city we live in is so ethnically diverse. Everyone from around the world comes to Ft. Hood to in obedience to the Presidents orders. Not on there own, but we are forced to live together and invade surrounding neighborhoods. This causes too many problems to mention. One of the major problems that I'll touch on is the same problem every major U.S. city faces at one point in time or another. If I'm not mistaken, it's called the inner city flee or something like that. Basically it's where a vast amount of immigrants (in this case, soldiers) come and overwhelm the elites in the inner city, causing them, along with their businesses to flee leaving the immigrants in poverty. Downtown Killeen looks like a section from the Third Ward in Houston. Of course it's much nicer, but they're facing the same condition...and that condition is poverty. So this soup kitchen is owned by brothers and sisters in Christ and they do the soup kitchen thing. But what's really cool about them is that they don't just hand out food and while people are on their way out say "Jesus loves you." No. They put on a full blown church service in this 20X10' space.
So, apparently...one day, Kelsey was acting weird and decided to do the Napoleon Dynamite wave-your-hands-like-a-bird deal and the owner of the soup kitchen saw her doing this and screamed, "YES, YOU NEED TO DO THAT!!! I WANT YOU TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT NEXT TIME YOU GUYS COME!" (I wasn't there, it's just what I've heard). So our missions group decided we should lead a worship service in the tightly compact dining area. So we got there and practiced in a room that was seriously no bigger than a middle-of-nowhere gas station restroom. It had enough space to fit a table and a couple of chairs, and a counter. So we went over the songs and the whole time, I was worried that our group would all make this whole thing about how good or bad we sound. So I told them all to make these songs your prayers to God. I know they here that every time they do corporate worship, but I seriously wanted to remind them of the importance of making your songs a prayer rather than a show. I find that when you sincerely sing to God, you sing with more enthusiasm. I know the level of enthusiasm is a major factor in leading worship. Ever since I saw Aaron in SFA at Student Life, I knew that it's absolutely necessary to show with your whole body, how much in love you are with God when leading worship. And the only way I know how to be enthusiastic about God is to actually be in His presence. Well, that's not the only way. But you get the point. So, basically, in a nutshell, everything went AMAZING!!!! We had people responding with smiles, clapping, standing up and dancing. There was this man beating the table SO HARD to the beat of "Into Marvelous Light I'm Running." Even though I had no intentions whatsoever to get a response from these people, it was great to see them. I'm in love with this talent God has given me to lead people to Christ through song, enthusiasm, and passion.
Now that I think of it, this is the first time I've participated in leading a worship service. To give you a good idea of what we were working with I'll explain to you the setting. And I'm going to be real honest, I'm not going to try and cover it up with candy drop sweet talk and what have you.
The city we live in is so ethnically diverse. Everyone from around the world comes to Ft. Hood to in obedience to the Presidents orders. Not on there own, but we are forced to live together and invade surrounding neighborhoods. This causes too many problems to mention. One of the major problems that I'll touch on is the same problem every major U.S. city faces at one point in time or another. If I'm not mistaken, it's called the inner city flee or something like that. Basically it's where a vast amount of immigrants (in this case, soldiers) come and overwhelm the elites in the inner city, causing them, along with their businesses to flee leaving the immigrants in poverty. Downtown Killeen looks like a section from the Third Ward in Houston. Of course it's much nicer, but they're facing the same condition...and that condition is poverty. So this soup kitchen is owned by brothers and sisters in Christ and they do the soup kitchen thing. But what's really cool about them is that they don't just hand out food and while people are on their way out say "Jesus loves you." No. They put on a full blown church service in this 20X10' space.
So, apparently...one day, Kelsey was acting weird and decided to do the Napoleon Dynamite wave-your-hands-like-a-bird deal and the owner of the soup kitchen saw her doing this and screamed, "YES, YOU NEED TO DO THAT!!! I WANT YOU TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT NEXT TIME YOU GUYS COME!" (I wasn't there, it's just what I've heard). So our missions group decided we should lead a worship service in the tightly compact dining area. So we got there and practiced in a room that was seriously no bigger than a middle-of-nowhere gas station restroom. It had enough space to fit a table and a couple of chairs, and a counter. So we went over the songs and the whole time, I was worried that our group would all make this whole thing about how good or bad we sound. So I told them all to make these songs your prayers to God. I know they here that every time they do corporate worship, but I seriously wanted to remind them of the importance of making your songs a prayer rather than a show. I find that when you sincerely sing to God, you sing with more enthusiasm. I know the level of enthusiasm is a major factor in leading worship. Ever since I saw Aaron in SFA at Student Life, I knew that it's absolutely necessary to show with your whole body, how much in love you are with God when leading worship. And the only way I know how to be enthusiastic about God is to actually be in His presence. Well, that's not the only way. But you get the point. So, basically, in a nutshell, everything went AMAZING!!!! We had people responding with smiles, clapping, standing up and dancing. There was this man beating the table SO HARD to the beat of "Into Marvelous Light I'm Running." Even though I had no intentions whatsoever to get a response from these people, it was great to see them. I'm in love with this talent God has given me to lead people to Christ through song, enthusiasm, and passion.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Cornered and overpowered with words and honesty.
I guess I consider myself a decent writer. I can usually paint a pretty vivid picture in an audiences mind using both abstract or concrete sentences. The writing I do here isn't writing. I'll assure you that. I think my favorite abstract idea I've done in writing recently has to be a description of tree's in the wind (I'm quoting myself, don't judge me. God gives me the ability to write, so per se, I'm quoting God)
"She can’t help but become hypnotized by nature’s beauty and the soft raindrop melody the treetops forever play as the wind composes her score."
I try to emphasize sentence fluency. If you can't read through a whole piece of literature fluently, it automatically turns the reader off. So that's my first emphasis. I think the second most important factor is word choice. When I do a serious piece of writing, I DETEST using words that have low comprehensive levels. It makes me sound unreliable! If you've ever received a text from me, you can see that what I value in writing also applies to texting. spelling annd gramer is a huge thing 2 me 2
haha
I think anybody who writes has to remove themselves from their own reality, and put themselves into their subjects small world. That's how I begin EVERYTHING I write about. I try to be more colorful in my writing when I'm engaged in dialogue simply because I'm not writing in place of someone else....I'm writing exactly how I feel. I'm able to grasp what I'm going through, how I'm feeling, what I'm thinking, and turn them into a scaled down model of any given experience. It isn't easy, but it's fun.
When God speaks to me, I'm often left speechless. I just don't know what to say. But when I do find words to say, they're usually very simple and small statements like "take control" or "you are my Savior." Or a simple "Thank you, I love you." When I hear Him speak to me, it's enough to bring me to my knees in tears exclaiming how much I love Him. So it's not out of the ordinary for me to be rendered speechless when I hear from God.
But today was the first time a human said something to me so comforting, relieving, honest, beautiful, and loving I am still, to this very moment, left with nothing else to say. And the things I said back in response were things this person already knew. I felt defeated, as if I were cornered and overpowered with words and honesty.
I can tell you one thing though...I love being cornered and overpowered with words and honesty by this person.
There's just nowhere else for us to go after that.
"She can’t help but become hypnotized by nature’s beauty and the soft raindrop melody the treetops forever play as the wind composes her score."
I try to emphasize sentence fluency. If you can't read through a whole piece of literature fluently, it automatically turns the reader off. So that's my first emphasis. I think the second most important factor is word choice. When I do a serious piece of writing, I DETEST using words that have low comprehensive levels. It makes me sound unreliable! If you've ever received a text from me, you can see that what I value in writing also applies to texting. spelling annd gramer is a huge thing 2 me 2
haha
I think anybody who writes has to remove themselves from their own reality, and put themselves into their subjects small world. That's how I begin EVERYTHING I write about. I try to be more colorful in my writing when I'm engaged in dialogue simply because I'm not writing in place of someone else....I'm writing exactly how I feel. I'm able to grasp what I'm going through, how I'm feeling, what I'm thinking, and turn them into a scaled down model of any given experience. It isn't easy, but it's fun.
When God speaks to me, I'm often left speechless. I just don't know what to say. But when I do find words to say, they're usually very simple and small statements like "take control" or "you are my Savior." Or a simple "Thank you, I love you." When I hear Him speak to me, it's enough to bring me to my knees in tears exclaiming how much I love Him. So it's not out of the ordinary for me to be rendered speechless when I hear from God.
But today was the first time a human said something to me so comforting, relieving, honest, beautiful, and loving I am still, to this very moment, left with nothing else to say. And the things I said back in response were things this person already knew. I felt defeated, as if I were cornered and overpowered with words and honesty.
I can tell you one thing though...I love being cornered and overpowered with words and honesty by this person.
There's just nowhere else for us to go after that.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
HA!! This is so cool!
These are the most used words in my blog...I guess that represents me for the most part...what'chu think? When you read this, do you see me?
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Well, anyways, today was the only day I decided to bring my computer around campus. Guess what happened....that hurricane decided it wanted to try and ruin my computer. HAHAHA!!!! But I had been informed about this unfortunate event coming, which then made me react. I TOOK AN UMBRELLA! Seems like imminent victory for Correy, devastating defeat for Hurricane right? WRONG! The Hurricane must have sabotaged my umbrella while I was fast asleep in the night because when I opened the umbrella, IT WAS INVERTED!!!! No protection from the wetness. BUT ALAS! Thanks to civilization and their desire to cram as many buildings into one place as physically possible, I was able to do a sort of quick waddling like jog to the next building. HAHAHA! I win.
I also GOT TO PLAY THE PIANO TODAY!!! WOOOOT! The sweet melodic sound that is created when a hammer strikes a tightly stretched cord! BEAUTIFUL INVENTION! Ultimately, it's God's invention of the ear that is beautiful, because without it, all I would experience from it would be a slight tickle of a vibration in the air.
For all who read this, I really need more people to join me in prayer for my new mission field as well as the one in Killeen. I think I'm going to start going on prayer walks at the night...because I usually end up wasting a lot of time doing random, meaningless tasks and I think most of you do too....I mean c'mon it's summer....what else are you doing? So I think I'll start my walks at around 10:30-11ish, feel free to join....I don't know how long I should go though....I guess until I feel like there's nothing left to pray about...but I've experienced answered prayer...so I know this won't be a waste of my time or yours. God doesn't let his people down. We'll be affecting communities that are in dire need of our Lord Jesus, while at the same time building and furthering the Kingdom of God. So please, if you don't know what to say...just pray that God's Will is done here in the Third Ward. I feel a restless Holy Spirit striving for the world outside of my heart.
And I'm not trying to encourage you in praying for what only surrounds my life here in Houston and in Killeen. I want you guys to join with me at this time because I believe we're a generation of Christians who don't sincerely, and wholeheartedly spend time with God through prayer. Well, I believe that because that's kind of how I am...maybe I'm just a horrible Christian...but I doubt I'm the only one out of all the people I know who spend little to no time at all in their day with God. I want to encourage you guys to join me so we can all really just continue building a more intimate relationship with our Creator. So if you're down...message, text, call, write a letter, send me a postcard, send your owl, I don't care how you do it....just let me know you're in.
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Well, anyways, today was the only day I decided to bring my computer around campus. Guess what happened....that hurricane decided it wanted to try and ruin my computer. HAHAHA!!!! But I had been informed about this unfortunate event coming, which then made me react. I TOOK AN UMBRELLA! Seems like imminent victory for Correy, devastating defeat for Hurricane right? WRONG! The Hurricane must have sabotaged my umbrella while I was fast asleep in the night because when I opened the umbrella, IT WAS INVERTED!!!! No protection from the wetness. BUT ALAS! Thanks to civilization and their desire to cram as many buildings into one place as physically possible, I was able to do a sort of quick waddling like jog to the next building. HAHAHA! I win.
I also GOT TO PLAY THE PIANO TODAY!!! WOOOOT! The sweet melodic sound that is created when a hammer strikes a tightly stretched cord! BEAUTIFUL INVENTION! Ultimately, it's God's invention of the ear that is beautiful, because without it, all I would experience from it would be a slight tickle of a vibration in the air.
For all who read this, I really need more people to join me in prayer for my new mission field as well as the one in Killeen. I think I'm going to start going on prayer walks at the night...because I usually end up wasting a lot of time doing random, meaningless tasks and I think most of you do too....I mean c'mon it's summer....what else are you doing? So I think I'll start my walks at around 10:30-11ish, feel free to join....I don't know how long I should go though....I guess until I feel like there's nothing left to pray about...but I've experienced answered prayer...so I know this won't be a waste of my time or yours. God doesn't let his people down. We'll be affecting communities that are in dire need of our Lord Jesus, while at the same time building and furthering the Kingdom of God. So please, if you don't know what to say...just pray that God's Will is done here in the Third Ward. I feel a restless Holy Spirit striving for the world outside of my heart.
And I'm not trying to encourage you in praying for what only surrounds my life here in Houston and in Killeen. I want you guys to join with me at this time because I believe we're a generation of Christians who don't sincerely, and wholeheartedly spend time with God through prayer. Well, I believe that because that's kind of how I am...maybe I'm just a horrible Christian...but I doubt I'm the only one out of all the people I know who spend little to no time at all in their day with God. I want to encourage you guys to join me so we can all really just continue building a more intimate relationship with our Creator. So if you're down...message, text, call, write a letter, send me a postcard, send your owl, I don't care how you do it....just let me know you're in.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
I'm kind of all written out...
Typing up a full 4 page movie analysis on what could possibly be one of the most puzzling thematic films ever produced in only two days kind of makes me sick of writing....but I still love doing it.
Well I apologize to the ones who read my blog every now and then...I told you guys I would post what it was I did on Saturday on Sunday...but I didn't....so yeah.
Anyways, a lot has gone on in these 5 short days, and I want to share with you some of the highlights!!! On Saturday, I went back to downtown with intentions of getting a brand new board so I could finally skate the spots in Downtown instead of just drooling over them....well, I needed to find this skateshop I had heard of called A-front. All I knew was that it was near the Aquarium restaurant just right under I-45. So as I was walking in that general direction...I noticed some people skating at this one spot across the street from Tranq. So I came up to one of them and asked them where I could find A-front.
Well, you know when you start talking to someone but you don't hear a word they say because they either, look oddly familiar and the whole time they're talking, you're trying to figure out WHO IT IS YOU'RE TALKING TO!!! Or they look like a celebrity and you wait for just the right moment to tell them who they look like and ask them if they get that from a lot of people. Well the guy I was talking to looked a lot like this skateboarder named Guru....he's been in a lot of skateboarding mags and so, the whole time he was talking, I was debating on whether or not I should ask him if his name was Guru....if it wasn't, I would end up looking like an idiot...if I didn't ask, I would never really know if it was Guru or not. So I didn't ask and I went on my way to find the skateshop....to make this long part of the story short, I ended up heading towards the skateshop but turning around to go back downtown because the further I went down the street, the more ghetto it became. I ended up going back to the place where I was given directions and then I was given the chance to ask his name...and it was in fact Guru. And a guy from Temple was there too. Anyways, I eventually decided I should try to find the skateshop again....I WAS TIRED OF THIS WALKING....So about a mile of walking later, I found it, set myself up a board and then started to head back to the bus terminal. On my way back I started getting super hungry...so I turned around to go back towards the inner city to go to Burger King....an oasis in the desert. Seriously, it's the only place open past 5 p.m.. So on my way there, I pass by this homeless man. He was sitting upright on a curb sleeping. His body looked as though he had just walked out of a concentration camp...his body was covered in what looked like lashes, he was covered in smog and dirt, his beard was matted...as well as his hair. So I continued on my way to Burger King. All I thought was, "Ah well, he's just a hobo." God's thoughts were different. As the space grew larger between the homeless man and I, the more I heard God speaking to me telling me to turn around. It's as if God used each inch to pierce my heart, injecting it with conviction...the further I got, the more my heart wrenched. I finally stopped and turned around. Following the Holy Spirit's command, I asked the man if he'd like something to eat. The emptiness on his face filled up with radiant joy. That's when I heard God tell me, "You see Correy, this isn't just some hobo, he's a child of mine, who I love very dearly." Moved with God's compassion, I was given the chance to share with this man, the message of Jesus Christ. By the end of our dinner and talk, I believe I saw tears hanging on for dear life, clinging onto his eyelids. I think he was trying so hard not to cry...
His name is Richard and about 12 years ago, he lost his job as a bricklayer and ever since then, he's been on the streets of Houston. Please pray for this man. Help him find the Way, the Truth, and Life.
Another thing I need prayer for is that I utilize EVERY opportunity God gives me in my mission field here in Houston. Because sometimes, I just don't have faith in God. In fact, every opportunity we pass up to share the Gospel to the lost, we don't have faith in God. Our fears become so large, it blinds us from seeing how much larger God's love is.
Well, I'll keep you guys posted on the mission field here in Houston.
Well I apologize to the ones who read my blog every now and then...I told you guys I would post what it was I did on Saturday on Sunday...but I didn't....so yeah.
Anyways, a lot has gone on in these 5 short days, and I want to share with you some of the highlights!!! On Saturday, I went back to downtown with intentions of getting a brand new board so I could finally skate the spots in Downtown instead of just drooling over them....well, I needed to find this skateshop I had heard of called A-front. All I knew was that it was near the Aquarium restaurant just right under I-45. So as I was walking in that general direction...I noticed some people skating at this one spot across the street from Tranq. So I came up to one of them and asked them where I could find A-front.
Well, you know when you start talking to someone but you don't hear a word they say because they either, look oddly familiar and the whole time they're talking, you're trying to figure out WHO IT IS YOU'RE TALKING TO!!! Or they look like a celebrity and you wait for just the right moment to tell them who they look like and ask them if they get that from a lot of people. Well the guy I was talking to looked a lot like this skateboarder named Guru....he's been in a lot of skateboarding mags and so, the whole time he was talking, I was debating on whether or not I should ask him if his name was Guru....if it wasn't, I would end up looking like an idiot...if I didn't ask, I would never really know if it was Guru or not. So I didn't ask and I went on my way to find the skateshop....to make this long part of the story short, I ended up heading towards the skateshop but turning around to go back downtown because the further I went down the street, the more ghetto it became. I ended up going back to the place where I was given directions and then I was given the chance to ask his name...and it was in fact Guru. And a guy from Temple was there too. Anyways, I eventually decided I should try to find the skateshop again....I WAS TIRED OF THIS WALKING....So about a mile of walking later, I found it, set myself up a board and then started to head back to the bus terminal. On my way back I started getting super hungry...so I turned around to go back towards the inner city to go to Burger King....an oasis in the desert. Seriously, it's the only place open past 5 p.m.. So on my way there, I pass by this homeless man. He was sitting upright on a curb sleeping. His body looked as though he had just walked out of a concentration camp...his body was covered in what looked like lashes, he was covered in smog and dirt, his beard was matted...as well as his hair. So I continued on my way to Burger King. All I thought was, "Ah well, he's just a hobo." God's thoughts were different. As the space grew larger between the homeless man and I, the more I heard God speaking to me telling me to turn around. It's as if God used each inch to pierce my heart, injecting it with conviction...the further I got, the more my heart wrenched. I finally stopped and turned around. Following the Holy Spirit's command, I asked the man if he'd like something to eat. The emptiness on his face filled up with radiant joy. That's when I heard God tell me, "You see Correy, this isn't just some hobo, he's a child of mine, who I love very dearly." Moved with God's compassion, I was given the chance to share with this man, the message of Jesus Christ. By the end of our dinner and talk, I believe I saw tears hanging on for dear life, clinging onto his eyelids. I think he was trying so hard not to cry...
His name is Richard and about 12 years ago, he lost his job as a bricklayer and ever since then, he's been on the streets of Houston. Please pray for this man. Help him find the Way, the Truth, and Life.
Another thing I need prayer for is that I utilize EVERY opportunity God gives me in my mission field here in Houston. Because sometimes, I just don't have faith in God. In fact, every opportunity we pass up to share the Gospel to the lost, we don't have faith in God. Our fears become so large, it blinds us from seeing how much larger God's love is.
Well, I'll keep you guys posted on the mission field here in Houston.
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Longest walk ever
Friday, July 11, 2008
A lot of people tend to get really cynical towards the people that surround UofH's campus. A lot of people tell me to watch myself when I'm in that area. How can I be attentive to God's voice if I'm too busy paying too much attention to myself? I don't instigate people to beat me up, I don't carry around a lot of expensive stuff (but when I carry my camera, it's in a lunch box type of carrying bag so it's kind of like urban camouflage) so if one day people decide they want to jump me for whatever reason...I know there'll be a reason for it and I know there'll be an opportunity to share the Gospel.
Anyways, the neighborhood surrounding UofH isn't exactly Bel-aire status. I'd say it resembles a housing project in New Orleans. But today was the third time I rode the bus to downtown, and every time I get on it, I'm usually welcomed with a exceptionally polite bus driver and then unwelcomed with about 30 of the nastiest glares you could ever see. I usually sit in the front of the bus, one time I sat in the back, but when I sit in the front...I look back and see brokenness, despair, loneliness, defeat, rebellion. And almost every time, I get this feeling...I don't know if it's the Holy Spirit whispering in my ear or if it's just one of my ridiculous day dreams...I get the feeling I should start a worship service on the bus...like just sporadically burst into song and start praising God. Paul went around most of the Roman empire preaching the Good News, and through Paul, God affected millions of lives (and if you want to get technical, if it weren't for his faith, Christianity wouldn't be as big as it is now, so in essence, his faith affected trillions of lives). God gave me a voice to praise His name, but the only time I sing is when I'm walking alone and not one person is within 100 yards away from me or in the laundry room that is surrounded by 5 inch thick concrete...
"...Do not be afraid; keep on speaking, do not be silent. 10For I am with you, and no one is going to attack and harm you, because I have many people in this city."
Acts 18:9b, 10
And the part where God says "for I have many people in this city," I actually overheard this woman talking to an older lady how it was Jesus who gave her life and took her away from a horrible life of drugs. Now I just need to learn some heavy southern Gospel!
Anyways, the neighborhood surrounding UofH isn't exactly Bel-aire status. I'd say it resembles a housing project in New Orleans. But today was the third time I rode the bus to downtown, and every time I get on it, I'm usually welcomed with a exceptionally polite bus driver and then unwelcomed with about 30 of the nastiest glares you could ever see. I usually sit in the front of the bus, one time I sat in the back, but when I sit in the front...I look back and see brokenness, despair, loneliness, defeat, rebellion. And almost every time, I get this feeling...I don't know if it's the Holy Spirit whispering in my ear or if it's just one of my ridiculous day dreams...I get the feeling I should start a worship service on the bus...like just sporadically burst into song and start praising God. Paul went around most of the Roman empire preaching the Good News, and through Paul, God affected millions of lives (and if you want to get technical, if it weren't for his faith, Christianity wouldn't be as big as it is now, so in essence, his faith affected trillions of lives). God gave me a voice to praise His name, but the only time I sing is when I'm walking alone and not one person is within 100 yards away from me or in the laundry room that is surrounded by 5 inch thick concrete...
"...Do not be afraid; keep on speaking, do not be silent. 10For I am with you, and no one is going to attack and harm you, because I have many people in this city."
Acts 18:9b, 10
And the part where God says "for I have many people in this city," I actually overheard this woman talking to an older lady how it was Jesus who gave her life and took her away from a horrible life of drugs. Now I just need to learn some heavy southern Gospel!
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Instead of blogging
I should be reading my Bible because it's almost dark and I've finished my homework. So enough procrastinating...if you're reading this, chances are you're procrastinating too...SO CLICK THE X ON THE UPPER LEFT HAND CORNER OF YOUR SCREEN, PICK UP GOD'S WORD, AND LET GOD'S LOVE SURROUND YOUR SOUL!!!!! :D Goodnight!
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Wow...
Government was fun today. We were discussing basic principles of government...that's the part I like because it's highly up for debate. I could go a whole year debating the basic principles of government. We discussed why it is government is so crucial and came up with "humans are naturally self centered and we will do whatever it takes to satisfy our needs." When we're left without any sort of system that gives people a moral structure, we become barbaric, brutal, murderous, and excruciatingly selfish. The teacher gave an example of a stronger kid in class chasing after a buffalo for food, while she made it clear that she wasn't going to chase after one herself. In her example, the situation, the kid that caught the buffalo and left it home, and in the meantime she'd take the buffalo away from his possession because she wasn't strong enough to catch it. The basis of her argument was "I don't care if it's not the right thing to do, I need to eat." Which is probably something most of us would do, I mean, it's survival, being selfish is a natural human quality. I then interjected and said, "Well, it's not like that's the only option. Your left with a choice when it all comes down to it. You have a choice to steal this man's buffalo, or you have a choice to get food for yourself." She then quickly says, "Yes, but acting selflessly goes against our own human nature!!" WOW!! I haven't heard more truth from a classroom lecture out of my combined 12 years of public school than I have today. I actually wrote about it back on my old myspace, how acting selflessly goes against every natural law of a human. I actually hate using the word sin in my discussions, because it automatically creates a wall between the person I'm trying to minister to and, in essence, God. So I use the word selfishness...because the truth is, they are interchangeable words. Think of one sin that isn't self-centered. Anyways, after she said that, I nodded, and let her continue on with the lecture. There goes one opportunity passed up for sharing the Good News. I could have said, "Yes, you're absolutely right, but name me the one person who has defied natural human law...put your trust in Him and He'll give you the ability to undermine your natural law as well."
James Madison once said, "If men were angels, no government would be necessary." If more people put their trust in God's hands rather than their own, we would then start to get a glimpse of the Kingdom of God on Earth. Just some encouraging words I'll leave you (and for myself too) with before I go...next time you catch yourself about to act in a very selfish manner, don't do it. Go against what you're about to do and do the EXACT OPPOSITE!!!! You'll start seeing more of how God works rather than man.
James Madison once said, "If men were angels, no government would be necessary." If more people put their trust in God's hands rather than their own, we would then start to get a glimpse of the Kingdom of God on Earth. Just some encouraging words I'll leave you (and for myself too) with before I go...next time you catch yourself about to act in a very selfish manner, don't do it. Go against what you're about to do and do the EXACT OPPOSITE!!!! You'll start seeing more of how God works rather than man.
iChat
WOOH!!! That thing is so much fun!!!! It's a great tool to stay in touch with the people back at home. I find it kind of hard to stay in touch through email, phone, or anything else...iChat lets you see and hear them. So it's pretty neat...if any of you guys have iChat hit me up, my screen name is Letsgoskate6. So, what random stuff should I do today? I still need to find a church, so if you could pray for that, I would appreciate it.
HOPE YOUR SURGERY GOES WELL EPPY!!!!
HOPE YOUR SURGERY GOES WELL EPPY!!!!
Monday, July 7, 2008
Frustration
My computer can't detect my camera's connection!!! So now I guess I'll have to leave all the pictures on my camera until I get back home to figure it out....or dump all the pictures onto the computer at home, and then burn them to a disk, then transfer them onto this computer, then edit them...dang. I'll have something for you to look forward to.
BLOGGING ON A SKYSCRAPER!!!

HAHA!!! I had no goal set for that trip other than going on top of a skyscraper!! Hahaha, that was random. Well, Jonathan didn't go because his mother is bringing him more stuff...but I'm probably going again tomorrow, it all depends on homework though.
The Bus ride was crazy!!! There was 30 people on the bus (including me)...two of whom were white, one mexican, and the rest were African American... (:o I had a 1400 dollar camera in my lap, a computer in my backpack (little did they know), and an iPod in my pocket!!! The entire route from school and back is seriously one of the worst living conditions I have ever witnessed!!! AAAHH! In reality, I wasn't really scared at all...the peace God gives us was what subdued that fear...my life's in His hands...what more could I ask for. Time to eat?
BLOGGING IN MY DORM!!
Am I doing this blogging thing right? Haha, it seems troublesome. It's fun though. Well, I'm looking for a bus route to downtown right now.

At lunch today, I got into the building where they were serving pizza and of course I'm feeling alone. I decided I should just sit by myself, you know...who cares, I'm not here to meet anybody anyways. But everybody was with someone else!!! Except this one kid, so I decided to sit down with him. I started talking with him, and he's one of those kids who isn't self conscience whatsoever. Now, this is something I think we all need to have, but I'm trying to describe him without being rude...he basically doesn't care what he does or says even when most people are making fun of him. Half the time, I think he's blissfully unaware that other people ridicule him. So then I saw this one girl across the room sitting by herself...so I decided to give her some company. When I got there, I saw that she wasn't really alone because the girl she was sitting with was just looking at stands all the organizations had set up. Turns out the girl that was gone follows Christ...so lunch was exciting. I've met two Christians in the short day I've been here!! And what's even better is that God is leading these people to me...I didn't ever once actively search for another Christian...just because I was moved with compassion for the girl sitting alone, I got to meet a really cool Christian.
Well anyways, I'm going back to my dorm to look for a bus route, and I see that same kid I first saw in the auditorium hall where we ate...the first kid I sat with. So I told him what I was about to do, and as I was walking into my dorm room about to shut my door, he says, "Hey do you think I can come?" UGH!!!!! Why? I've been wanting to do this alone for a while. But the way he said it...he just sounded so alone. So the verse that has been popping up into my head all day, kind of the theme for the day, maybe my life...hopefully for my life is Matthew 25:40 "The king will reply 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me." So, I'm about to go explore downtown with this kid Jonathan, lets see what God has in store for him!!!

At lunch today, I got into the building where they were serving pizza and of course I'm feeling alone. I decided I should just sit by myself, you know...who cares, I'm not here to meet anybody anyways. But everybody was with someone else!!! Except this one kid, so I decided to sit down with him. I started talking with him, and he's one of those kids who isn't self conscience whatsoever. Now, this is something I think we all need to have, but I'm trying to describe him without being rude...he basically doesn't care what he does or says even when most people are making fun of him. Half the time, I think he's blissfully unaware that other people ridicule him. So then I saw this one girl across the room sitting by herself...so I decided to give her some company. When I got there, I saw that she wasn't really alone because the girl she was sitting with was just looking at stands all the organizations had set up. Turns out the girl that was gone follows Christ...so lunch was exciting. I've met two Christians in the short day I've been here!! And what's even better is that God is leading these people to me...I didn't ever once actively search for another Christian...just because I was moved with compassion for the girl sitting alone, I got to meet a really cool Christian.
Well anyways, I'm going back to my dorm to look for a bus route, and I see that same kid I first saw in the auditorium hall where we ate...the first kid I sat with. So I told him what I was about to do, and as I was walking into my dorm room about to shut my door, he says, "Hey do you think I can come?" UGH!!!!! Why? I've been wanting to do this alone for a while. But the way he said it...he just sounded so alone. So the verse that has been popping up into my head all day, kind of the theme for the day, maybe my life...hopefully for my life is Matthew 25:40 "The king will reply 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me." So, I'm about to go explore downtown with this kid Jonathan, lets see what God has in store for him!!!
A Test Drive for Blogging.
So, I'm going to try this out...might be cool, might not...who knows. I'm doing this right before my first summer class starts at UofH. I need to start taking pictures...I haven't used my camera since....uhhh....last Wednesday!!! HOLLA!
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